


fuck buddies

by colderthancold



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F, Mentions of Sex, Other couples mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 00:11:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17497958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colderthancold/pseuds/colderthancold
Summary: It was meant to be feeling-less sex, but she fell still.





	fuck buddies

Nico knew she wasn’t supposed to have feelings for her, and even thought it was clichéd and even more though she hated it, she still fell for Minami Kotori. It was meant to be feeling-less sex, but she fell still. And that made her feel like a fucking idiot, to say the least. A fucking over-romantic moron who couldn’t keep her safety-pinned heart to herself.

It started at work. Nico worked as a secretary and Kotori as an intern in the same company. They hadn’t talked much until they were fired the same day and decided to go drink together. They drank like it was the end of the world and woke up to see the other naked by their side. And one thing leads to the other— days later they were self-declared fuck buddies.

“But no feelings, yeah?” Nico said one time. Kotori nodded.

“No feelings.” She said. She pecked Nico’s lips. “No feelings at all.”

But things were getting hard. Once, Nico woke up and Kotori was still asleep. She opened the curtains and the sun fell on Kotori’s face beautifully, making Nico’s heart sink. Kotori was more than pretty, more than gorgeous— she was mesmerizing. Nico went to the kitchen and cooked breakfast to distract herself from the newfound feeling she had experienced. She dropped a cup. It broke. She took a deep breath.

“No feelings.” She muttered under her breath, which felt heavy and out of place. Then Kotori walked where she was. She was smiling sleepily and asked:

“Did you say something?”

Nico looked at her and then elsewhere. It hurt less.

“Nothing.”

 

* * *

 

Nico walked around the city with money inside her pocket. She had sold some old things to some old friends. Things she used to care about but didn’t bother to anymore. She had been practicing becoming numb. (Spoiler alert: it wasn’t working.)

She walked into a jewelry store. It was the first time she was inside one. She wondered if she smelt like poverty, and that made her feel weird. Anyways, smelling like poverty or not, she was buying something. Kotori had said she liked necklaces a few months before and Nico was going to buy her one. She decided to buy her the most expensive one even if she’d have problems to pay rent after that, hoping Nozomi and Eli would have her back if she ended up on the streets again. She knew they’d understand the situation she was in, even if she didn’t want her closest friends to know she was Kotori’s fuck buddy. She knew they’d get all dumb and irritating and would start to try to make them become something.

And Nico still wasn’t sure if she wanted to be something with Kotori just yet. Because she was confused and was just letting her heart lose for a day.

She bought the necklace and walked back to her place feeling cold. Winters were harsh without someone by her side.

 

* * *

 

“Nico-chan…” ‘Nico-chan’. Kotori never used honorifics with her because Nico asked her not to. She thought it could make them start having feelings for each other. But this time, it was different. “I can’t accept this.”

“You can. But you don’t want to.” Nico said. She wanted a smoke even though she had never smoked because she thought it was stupid. But now she felt stupid. “It’s okay, though. But keep it. I don’t want it either.”

“No, I’ll… I’ll keep it, alright? It’s just…” Kotori moved, as if to get closer to her, but hesitated too much and decided it was better not to. “Are you okay, Nico-chan?”

“Cut it out with the ‘chan’, will ya?” Nico sounded calm and even nice but there was something about her face that wasn’t as nice as the rest. She sat in front of Kotori. She hadn’t put the necklace on. Nico felt pathetic.

“Nico—” Kotori moved her hand is if to hold Nico’s, but Nico moved away.

“Just— don’t make me say it, okay? Don’t make me say it.” Nico said. Kotori’s frown was sad and confused.

“What?” Tears were rolling down her cheeks. Nico wanted to know why.

“That —for fuck’s sake— I’m in love with you, alright?!” Nico hit the table with the palms of her hands and the necklace fell. Kotori took it. They remained in silence for a while.

“Thanks. For the necklace, I mean. I… I’m leaving. Take care, okay?” She said. Then she left.

Nico was all alone again. Not like she wasn’t before, anyways.

 

* * *

 

Nico saw her a few times after that. Her fuck buddy. She was seeing a girl, apparently. Kousaka. She worked with Nozomi. Nozomi said she was nice. Didn’t have anger outbursts nor complicated and conflictive feelings like a girl she used to know. It seemed like Kousaka knew how to make Kotori feel like the princess she was, like a knight or some shit. Nico was still a pauper. Once a pauper, always a pauper, she repeated herself. Once a pauper, always an idiot.

But it was alright. She was starting to see this girl, too. Hanayo. She was a cutie and Nico felt like she could become better when loving her. She enjoyed being with her. She loved her voice, her ways, her little motions. She loved her.

And sometimes they look at each other. You know, sometimes Nico makes eye-contact with Kotori. And Kotori smiles. Nico smiles back. Nothing to lose with a smile, right?

And they keep walking without looking back. In the end, there’s nothing to see.

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys. hope you like this! i tried something different this time so yeah! take care and remember to smile!


End file.
